"Describe one thing that you have learned since you first got sick ."
It's a challenge to pin down just one thing since being sick forces us to learn (and learn...and learn...) many things throughout our lives. I know that I've had to learn to ask for help when I need help. I've learned to prioritize my "to do" list because if I try to do it all, I'm just asking for trouble. I've learned to listen to my body's cues and not ignore them. When I don't listen to what my body is telling me, then I end up regretting it deeply. In my life, and I'm sure that any chronically ill person will agree, learning is a constant state of being.
My answer to this questions was this:
"I've learned that I have to remember that I'm more than just a physical body. If I don't remember that, then I will find it so much harder to find anything in life to be joyful about or to fight for."
I wanted to expand on my answer. When the pain gets so intense that I can scarcely think of anything except the pain, the last thing on my mind is looking inward and remembering that my body is just one part of me. It's hard to be aware of anything except how completely devastating the physical pain is. It takes so much effort to climb out of emotional pit that constant pain digs for me. The more intense the pain is, the deeper into the pit I fall. And it's a free fall. There is no rope to grab nor is there a soft landing when I eventually hit the bottom.
That's the most important lesson that I'm learning. I know it's a life long lesson and I know that there will be times in which I'll struggle with that lesson but I'll always try to apply it in my life. It's the lesson that has been the difference between finding joy or humor in moments, and the strength in myself and drowning in a bottomless pool of despair and misery.
