Wearing my "Big Girl" pants...

Sometimes it takes all of the effort that I have in me to make it through a painful day without constantly complaining about how lousy I feel. I know that it won't make me feel any better if I do and it is probably pretty annoying to be on the receiving end of. Sometimes I have to put how I feel on the back burner so that I can take care of my responsibilities. This is my idea of wearing my "Big Girl" pants.

Today was a "Big Girl" pants kind of day. I don't do well with rainy weather and today was a rainy day. My body hurts in ways that I never imagined it could. Today was a day when all that I wanted to do was to whine and call my dad and cry. I held it together and fought the urge to curl up into the fetal position and sob.

I'm really lucky that I have an amazing husband who doesn't mind letting me cry and complain when I need to be heard. He actually encourages me to tell him what I'm feeling even if it's just going to be complaining about how much pain I'm dealing with. If I didn't have the kind of support that Steve gives me, I would not be able to get through the days like this when wearing my "Big Girl" pants isn't optional.

Best. Husband. Ever!

Beautiful

I am sitting on my couch after a long day of work and I just got to thinking about how absolutely beautiful my daughter is. Olivia isn't just a pretty face; she is just so much more than that. I've watched her go from a cranky little bundle of fussiness to toddler who be explained best as an unstoppable force of nature. She's been so many different children in her lifetime, but one constant remains. She is beautiful, inside and out. I've seen that inner beauty shine through when she stands up for herself and for other people that may not feel like they can. I love how she thinks for herself. I think it's awesome that she doesn't rely on the opinions of anyone, including me and Steve, to paint a portrait of who she is. She is an absolutely beautiful person and I'm thankful for her and insanely proud of her.

There have been times when I have been ready to sell her little butt to the highest bidder (not literally!. I haven't met a parent with a perfect kid yet so it's pretty safe to say that perfect children are mythical creatures. Olivia has flaws, just like every other person who is now alive or who has ever lived, but that's not the point. I don't want her to be anything other than who she is. I believe that perfection stunts a person's growth anyway, so perfection isn't all that great. Olivia uses the mistakes that she makes to learn from them. I know a lot of adults who aren't even capable of that after a lifetime of making the same mistakes. She stands by her opinions and doesn't change them based on what other people think and I think that is pretty incredible. She has always been like that and it took me a long time to really see how big that really is! She has her own beliefs, but she's always willing to learn more. It's a huge sign of maturity. Hell, I think that she is further ahead than I am as far as that's concerned! I'm proud of who she is.

She has a track meet today and I wish I was there right now. I don't care about how well she does or doesn't do. I just love seeing her do things that she enjoys doing! She simply shines.

Olivia is beautiful!